Monday, August 16, 2010

On Love

What if I say I shall not wait?
What if I burst the fleshly gate
And pass, escaped, to thee?
What if I file this mortal off,
See where it hurt me, - that's enough, -
And wad in liberty?

They cannot take us any more, -
Dungeons my call, and guns implore,
Unmeaning now, to me
As laughter was an hour ago,
or laces, or a traveling show,
Or who died yesterday

-- Emily Dickinson

Today is QiXi, aka Chinese Valentines day. It is the seventh day and of the seventh lunar month according to the Chinese calendar. I've never been known to enjoy the celebration of any festivals or holidays and today is of no exception. The reason why I wanted to mention QiXi is because I am more intrigued by the folklore behind it more than the cultural traditions associated with it. The story, if any of you care to know is about the love between a mortal and a goddess and the forbidden love they share that eventually lead to their eternal separation. On the surface it is just one of the many cliche love tales but to me it is a case of the struggle not for love, but for rather companionship.Some years ago when I viewed everything through rose colored classes, I was a firm believer of true love and the existence of "the one" or a "soul mate". But as time passed and people changed, so have my conceptions about what love really is. And to me, the yearning to be with someone is as simple albeit powerful as the desire to seek companionship. We see this in the animal kingdom, although differing in purpose and social codes, human beings are just as driven to seek out any suitable mate as animals. Thus this primal instinct is non-discriminatory, meaning we don't really care if we get matched up with "the one" as long as we find one.
For all the romantics out there, I'm sorry if this has disappointed you but it is merely of my personal opinion and observation. However, I do believe that our will to seek out companionship and the desire to maintain it is what eventually transform into what we call "love". And this love to me is very, very real and in no ways like that between two mating animals. However, we must understand that this powerful and unique bond between people must first stem from the need for companionship therefore it is not exclusive to members of the opposite sex. We also must understand that the only type of love worth maintaining is one having endured many conflicts and great hardship because that is the only test of one's commitment to another. In conclusion, this trumps the idea of "soul mate" because the implication of "destined to be together" connotes not an idea of "fighting for what's valued" but a notion of "what's yours will always be effortlessly yours".

10 comments:

ching said...

there's a Chinese Valentine Day? wow that's lovely. :)

thyaudaciousness.blogspot.com/

CAROLINE said...

Oh, that sounds exciting. Wait, what about Feb 14th? Anyways, I've scrolled down and taken a few looks on your outfit: must say you dress quite nicely :)

♥ M i m i said...

WTF
HOW COME I DIDN`T KNOW THIS FESTIVAL/DAY EXISTED?

Jeez my family keeps me in the dark about everything, I swear. They're always on me to be more "Chinese" you know: show more respect to elders, dress more conservatively, be more responsible, be more of a "good" girl (aka. clean my room more often...), get straight A's. Stuff like that.

But nobody in my family has ever mentioned QiXi to me!

Maybe it's only in certain parts of China that celebrate it? Oh hey there's a link. I'll just click it and read.

Be right back.

Back.

Omgosh I remember someone telling me a variation on this story. Or maybe it was one of those backstories to a character in those Monkey King books/shows. You know. The Monkey King? LOL. Who was under the mountain or something. And a monk saved him from a gigantic hand or something? And there's the pig who's a pig literally who's always after girls but he's so piggy and ugly he can't get em? And there's the peaches or whatever. Oh gosh, wow. Chinese stories are the best lol.

Anyway, I guess I do remember some parts of the QiXi story... just no the festival/celebration. I didn't know anybody celebrated this day. Wow.

Awwe Xu.
I still believe in the One.
I still think that there's a guy out there who's looking for the same things I am. Who's overcome the same obstacles I have and have learned the same lessons. You know, a guy who thinks about the same things I do. Someone I can... yeah, do things with that my friends don't want to do, like stargazing and going on nature hikes, small things like that. So yeah I am looking for companionship but I'm also looking for a soulmate. Someone who will look at my faults and not try to correct them but show me his as well and somehow our faults will be like a negative multiplied by a negative which then turns into a positive. Yeah like that.

Oh I love your scarf.
You look so formal today :D
A good formal.
Aren't you hot in those jeans and blazer tho?! It's like fricking 35 degrees here in Langley!
(Oh btw, I do think you're hot as in attractive ;D but what I meant was it's fricking 35 degrees!!!)

Oh and thanks for the tips!
I don't eat enough these days. Which means I don't get much nutrition. Which means my hair and skin doesn't get enough nutrition. But I deal by sleeping tons.

Eww acne. Worst thing ever. My mom said that when she was a kid, nobody had acne. So now I wonder if it's just a cultural/societal/generational thing? I mean there's a KFC/McD's around every corner, nobody gets enough exercise anymore, or sleep enough due to heavy facebook usage/video game playing, or something? It's the American lifestyle :S

♥ M i m i said...

Woah I didn't even know this festival existed!

Jeez my family keeps me in the dark about everything, I swear. They're always on me to be more "Chinese" you know: show more respect to elders, dress more conservatively, be more responsible, be more of a "good" girl (aka. clean my room more often...), get straight A's. Stuff like that.

But nobody in my family has ever mentioned QiXi to me!

Maybe it's only in certain parts of China that celebrate it? Oh hey there's a link. I'll just click it and read.

Be right back.

Back.

Omgosh I remember someone telling me a variation on this story. Or maybe it was one of those backstories to a character in those Monkey King books/shows. You know. The Monkey King? LOL. Who was under the mountain or something. And a monk saved him from a gigantic hand or something? And there's the pig who's a pig literally who's always after girls but he's so piggy and ugly he can't get em? And there's the peaches or whatever. Oh gosh, wow. Chinese stories are the best lol.

Anyway, I guess I do remember some parts of the QiXi story... just no the festival/celebration. I didn't know anybody celebrated this day. Wow.

Awwe Xu.
I still believe in the One.
I still think that there's a guy out there who's looking for the same things I am. Who's overcome the same obstacles I have and have learned the same lessons. You know, a guy who thinks about the same things I do. Someone I can... yeah, do things with that my friends don't want to do, like stargazing and going on nature hikes, small things like that. So yeah I am looking for companionship but I'm also looking for a soulmate. Someone who will look at my faults and not try to correct them but show me his as well and somehow our faults will be like a negative multiplied by a negative which then turns into a positive. Yeah like that.

Oh I love your scarf.
You look so formal today :D
A good formal.
Aren't you hot in those jeans and blazer tho?! It's like fricking 35 degrees here in Langley!
(Oh btw, I do think you're hot as in attractive ;D but what I meant was it's fricking 35 degrees!!!)

Oh and thanks for the tips!
I don't eat enough these days. Which means I don't get much nutrition. Which means my hair and skin doesn't get enough nutrition. But I deal by sleeping tons.

Eww acne. Worst thing ever. My mom said that when she was a kid, nobody had acne. So now I wonder if it's just a cultural/societal/generational thing? I mean there's a KFC/McD's around every corner, nobody gets enough exercise anymore, or sleep enough due to heavy facebook usage/video game playing, or something? It's the American lifestyle :S

♥ M i m i said...

Sorry for the comment overload. I always copy my longer comments in case some error occurs. Which happened just now. Anyway, I hope you got the comment = = I will be pissed off if you didn't. Please kindly delete this one after you read it hehe. It's more of an informative thing.

So.

Hope you got my last 2 comments? <3

Emily and Abigail said...

lusting that scarf!!

www.lovelywanderlust.com

ANDWHATELSEISTHERE said...

i never knew before that the chinese have their own Valentine's day. will there be any particular celebration of its own?

ANDWHATELSEISTHERE

SHOP

c a r l l a said...

nice post. greattt outfit ;)

ribbonybow

c a r l l a said...

heey, xu. please change my url on your award. you can look for me to ribbonybow, I've been replacing my blog url, thanksss

CARLLA,
ribbonybow

Kheira said...

Love your jacket !