Ok, so my friend posted a picture of me on Facebook. In it, my right breast is very discernibly droopy. I am a young woman and so far, I’m losing the war against gravity. I comment on the photo and also thinking the same thing: “oh man, I really need to start wearing bras.”
The truth is, I haven’t worn a proper bra with paddings and underwires in almost five years. Ever since second year university, when my feminist values started to root and flourish within me, I’ve began to detest putting my breasts in those things. Everyday, I would put on the bra that I’ve been wearing since high school and feel its underwires digging into my ribcage and the elastic straps sinking into my flesh. “Have I gained weight?” “Are my breasts getting bigger?” I used to think to myself but I knew that I’ve been the same size ever since I stopped developing at age 17. Every time I got dressed in the morning, I became more and more aware of the suffocating and stifling feeling of wearing a bra.
I eventually started to go without one because I didn’t think it was normal or even necessary to cram something so irregular such as the human upper torso into something that was pre-made and obviously not suited for living comfortably. So, what is my lesson from seeing my sagging breast in the picture?
Yeah, I should wear a bra. I also should have listen to my father and married rich. Shouldn’t have bothered with trying to get into graduate school because smart women are not as desirable because they’re too opinionated. While I’m at it, I should also laugh at sexists jokes or lewd one-liners about rape because girls with a sense of humour do so much better in social situations. I should always feel sexy and validated as a woman when men hit on me or grab my ass and feel guilty and apologetic immediately afterwards when they get furious and call me “fucking dyke” when I don’t respond in a positive way. Really, I should be what a “woman” ought to be and I could if right now, I give up everything that is ever important to me as a female, as a woman but importantly as a human being. Frankly, I don’t think that sounds fair.