Social Retard

This is my fourth week of being jobless and it's probably the best thing ever. Going to be at 4 A.M. in the morning and waking up in the afternoon, I'm starting to feel like a teenager again but without the self-esteem issues, suicidal tendencies and of course, parental tyranny.

The only downside to my unemployment is that I don't have as much money to spend on shit I like. I've pretty much stopped shopping for clothes and have even made strict rules about how often I should be going out. So there's been a lot of staying at home and cooking for myself, looking after the cats and waiting for school to start. Life is good and mellow.

 Obviously this can get boring very fast so I'm already planning on starting a few arts and craft projects. First thing on the docket is an oldie but a goodie - tye-dyed products.

Also, remember when I said I got rid of the long wispy bangs. Here some new short-ass baby bangs for the summer. They are pretty awesome but hard to maintain especially when I have to trim it myself without proper scissors every two weeks or so.

Lastly, here's my recent favourite local band. They are called B-lines and they are excellent.

Zebras and New Hair

Happy Sunday!

New Hair!

In the process of applying for grad school. Wish me luck!

Twelve Days of Christmas Sweaters - Day 1:Peacock colours and a Pair of Docs

Hello! As Christmas is fast approaching, I am going full throttle with decking myself out with some of my favourite sweaters!

Since I'm a few days behind the first day of twelve days before Christmas (This sentence is like a word problem), I'm going double up a couple of outfit photos to make it in time for the 25th.

Stay tuned, stay excited and stay warm, everybody.

Creepers

It's been a week and I'm still trying to figure out how to properly style my hair. Being a terribly lazy individual who prefers everything low-maintenace, this hair style has posed as a bit of a challenge.

Some may regard straight hair to be a blessing but I see it as a boring, lifeless, flat-to-the-scalp nuisance. So far, I've tried almost every technique known to beauty experts to make the right side of my head more tousled and bouncy and this is the best I can come up with. I spent about twenty minutes playing with it, putting in volumizing  mousse and hair curlers and blow drying and whatnot and eventually decided that that amount of time is simply way too much time spent on four inches of hair.

I ended up rubbed my scalp with much vigour hoping that perhaps a static charge in the follicles can make my hair stand up more. I think it eventually worked.
Oh hey, did I mention that I now own a pair of T.U.K's creepers?! Fuck yeah!

Look at the height on these babies. I mean, they definitely slow me way down whenever I prance up the stairs home but they are worth every second prolonged between point A to point B.

The Breasts of a Feminist

Ok, so my friend posted a picture of me on Facebook. In it, my right breast is very discernibly droopy. I am a young woman and so far, I’m losing the war against gravity. I comment on the photo and also thinking the same thing: “oh man, I really need to start wearing bras.” 

The truth is, I haven’t worn a proper bra with paddings and underwires in almost five years. Ever since second year university, when my feminist values started to root and flourish within me, I’ve began to detest putting my breasts in those things. Everyday, I would put on the bra that I’ve been wearing since high school and feel its underwires digging into my ribcage and the elastic straps sinking into my flesh. “Have I gained weight?” “Are my breasts getting bigger?” I used to think to myself but I knew that I’ve been the same size ever since I stopped developing at age 17. Every time I got dressed in the morning, I became more and more aware of the suffocating and stifling feeling of wearing a bra. 

I eventually started to go without one because I didn’t think it was normal or even necessary to cram something so irregular such as the human upper torso into something that was pre-made and obviously not suited for living comfortably. So, what is my lesson from seeing my sagging breast in the picture?

Yeah, I should wear a bra. I also should have listen to my father and married rich.  Shouldn’t have bothered with trying to get into graduate school because smart women are not as desirable because they’re too opinionated. While I’m at it, I should also laugh at sexists jokes or lewd one-liners about rape because girls with a sense of humour do so much better in social situations.  I should always feel sexy and validated as a woman when men hit on me or grab my ass and feel guilty and apologetic immediately afterwards when they get furious and call me “fucking dyke” when I don’t respond in a positive way. Really, I should be what a “woman” ought to be and I could if right now, I give up everything that is ever important to me as a female, as a woman but importantly as a human being. Frankly, I don’t think that sounds fair.

Hey look, I have short hair now.

Coming of Age

The black hair is back.

I'm turning 26 next week and felt a little silly looking into the mirror with all the pinks, purples, greens and blues in my hair. I remedied that with dying it black. Superfluous yet necessary.

Instead of playing with colours in my hair I felt that it was time to experiment with different hues in dressing instead.

Yellow, grey and purple colour blocking is a lot more fun than dry and damaged haystack on my head.

Feminism as Humanism

Facebook is great for when you want to judge people based on what pictures they have or what they say they are interested in. It can also be great for turning a moderately political back-and-forth set of comments into a full-blown meta-analysis about why the previous comments surrounding the topic of gender politics are one-sided, overgeneralizing and some what sexist. There were some comments made between a friend of mine and his friend that showed up on my facebook feed today which were less than encouraging. My friend updated his status a few days ago saying how a girl in his political science class apparently hates him. Even before reading the comments people have made about his status, I already smell the witch burning smoke. I knew this is one of those cases where a male felt threatened by a female because she's "too powerful" or in this case too politically charged. I was curious and have a lot of opinions, so I read what people wrote about his status update. Sure enough, my friend expressed that he felt like the innocent victim of a men-hating feminist. To be precise, he felt like that by virtue of the fact that he is male and exists was enough to warrant the wrath of an angry, female political science student.  

Following his self-deprecating note, one of his friends commented about how women aims to control men and then she proceeded to write about how there's a double standard against men in our current political environment wherein some men are not allowed to participate politics...........WTF?!!! THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE HEARD THIS. The worst thing about her comments was she is actually calling "bullshit" on feminists by pointing out how unfairly privileged and over-advantaged women are these days and that she is actually advocating egalitarianism and gender equality by doing this. As I stared at these comments, confused and dumfounded, I began to feel uneasy. Then, it turned into absolute horror. I was terrified of the notion that people saw and perhaps will always see feminists as men-hating, angry and opportunistic "butch dykes". I was terrified of the fact that feminism is actually being misrepresented and misunderstood by women. However, I was mostly terrified by the fact that women have now turned against each other in trying to defend themselves as feminists, against other feminists.  



After mentally dissecting her logic and finding a fitting rebuttal, I wrote, "I see valid points in all comments but I must get one thing straight because I think a great deal of feminists aren't "ball-kickers" looking to politically castrate males. In fact, all the feminists I know, myself included, are not the radical, men-bashing, extreme left types. Feminism strictly speaking is a proponent of humanism which supports an egalitarian point of view. However some women who identify themselves as feminists can be very radical in their outlook but most of those opinions have been argued as counter productive in promoting true equality. I don't believe large political parties such as the Liberal, Conservatives and the NDP keeping men from participating, however I can see this happening in certain small-scale, grass-root feminist organizations. With that being said, gender-based exclusivity is actually more prominent against women throughout history than the other way around. In fact, women have only earned their political right to even vote just over a hundred years ago while men have been in government and positions of authority for way longer. In terms of male domination in the fundamental way, I do agree with you, most men don't control women or have any desire to. However, male domination is alive and well in other cultures. So much so that women are treated as second-class citizens. Moreover, because male domination has become so frowned upon in progressive cultures, people have become extremely sensitive towards gender politics however sexism has not been completely eradicated. Thus now we're dealing with a new type male-domination that is a lot more subtle and hidden but if you pay attention to certain details, you can see it everywhere. Take for example the phenomena of gender asymmetry in the beauty industry. Just think about how many women vs. men buy into the industry by purchasing beauty products and maintaining their appearance . How many cosmetic conglomerates are owned and operated by men vs. women or even how differently girls and boys are taught about their physical image from a young age. These are the types of issues we're dealing with now."

Is this what feminism has become? Please tell me not all women have turned against each other. 

Funemployment

Hello blogosphere at 5:30 A.M.! As of yesterday I handed in my two weeks notice at my place of employment. This may seem unwise considering I need it to pay the bills and support my insatiable online and thrift shopping obsessions. 

In reality, I have been mulling over this decision for a very long time, since last year to be exact. Actually, ever since I started talking everyone at work into joining an union because there had been absolute no workers/supervisor egalitarianism or job security. It has been a year since that fiasco and even though we voted and won our rights to join the union, I have never stopped fighting my boss over issues such as fair treatment of every staff, gender discrimination (it is still the unspoken rule that male staff are not allowed to be left alone with the children we provide care for, because it "looks bad" by virtue of the fact that males are seemingly "more dangerous" and "more likely to molest kids") and managerial accountability. After all, he does run a non-profit society for children for fuck sakes! Shouldn't us adults lead by example by advocating equality, freedom and the rights of everyone? You see, this is where people get lost on, the whole rights for everyone thing. Most people think unions only protect workers and make managers and supervisors jobs difficult. Yes, this can certainly be the case however, from what I understand based on the basic functions of what unions do, they actually provide as an impartial, third-party scrutinizer for worksites. This means, accountability and responsibility need to come from both the workers and the managers. My boss, on the other hand, thought unions are going to make him lose his job or give his employees too much right that we'll go and ransack his office, or somehow get away with kidnapping his family or something. Seriously though, he was fucking paranoid.

So ever the past year; after our winning of the union vote and during our "pre-unionized limbo", I've been nothing but brutally honest with my boss about just how unhappy I've been with the practices and philosophies at WCASS (workplace acronym). I have had many a shouting matches over the phone and in person with various managers about their hypocritical and ludicrous way of dealing certain cases. Though all of which have something to do with fair treatment and equal rights but they ultimately affect the lives of the kids we provide care for. Thus, putting my self-righteous ego aside, a huge part of me is tormented by the paradox and irony of all of it. I sometimes find it hard to face the kids and teach them about being fair and respectful for every person and living creature whilst putting away cheques signed by people who think it's perfectly ok to execute brilliant plans such as relocate an unwilling staff because another staff complained about her being "too pretty" which "distracted" the kids from their daily activities and fire people during the middle of a union movement.

In a way, I feel like I've failed the kids for leaving and having to lie to them why I will be leaving. Through I know that it will not be fair for me lay the real reason behind my leaving nor would it be productive in a sense that trying to explain something like this to them now would only do more harm than good. The shittiest thing about this whole thing is that I feel selfish for not sucking it up and do it for the kids. I just hope someone else would come along and set a better example for them.
Moving on to the future, my unofficial last day is next friday but really I'm suppose to stay for another week after that. At this point, I don't think it'll make a difference how long I stay because the human resources department which consists of only one person - my boss (autocracy much?) will "have time" to find someone to replace me. I am going to look at job postings on craigslist now. Wish me luck.

Slow Cook

Happy Thanksgiving all of you Turkey lovers. My long weekend was extremely productive. I played a show on Friday night along with some great local punk bands and just had an absolute ball! Now I can't wait to get back into writing more stuff so we can start touring and play shows every night. 

Saturday was awesome. I went thrift shopping and got myself a wicked leopard print jacket (pictured below). It was only $7.99 and in great condition. I wore it out to see a friend today and five minutes into my trip I started to sweat. Of course, my vanity told me to keep it on so I sweated my entire Skytrain ride all the way from the East of GVA to the West end.

I also coloured my hair half pink and half turquoise but after several washes the pink bled into the turquoise so now I have mixed colours in the right portion of my hair. So far it doesn't look bad but I'm sure after more washes and when the brassy yellow tinge start to come out, it'll start driving me bat-shit insane. 

I've been procrastinating and putting off the opening of my Etsy shop. Shit! Maybe this week I'll find some time. When I do finally get it together, I'll link it to all of you right away. Sorry about the filler post, I really just wanted to showcase my outfit without having to write anything too involving and long.

SLC Punk!

One of the best independent movies ever. Underrated, witty and informative. 

for the children

I got bored of the purple and green so now my hair is pink and orange. 

Space tiger for the win. 

Bungle Love

How come I never talk about what I wear. I do, sometimes. The thing is I find it really weird to talk about clothes. Most of the time I really don't know what to say about what I'm wearing beyond the redundancy of describing them in words when the photos do a much better job.

As per usual, I'm going to blog about something else completely separate from fashion and style. I'm going to talk about music and how much I appreciate the fact that I'm somewhat musical. 

Lunch today was curry and Bob Dylan as the background "noise". The thing about folk music is that they are very loud, both in the sheer volume of the instrumentations as well as their content. It was hard to digest curry with Bob's quick-fingers and harmonica bursts interrupting each bite but I didn't care because the music inspires me.  Another thing about music is that it has to inspire me to want to be creative in order for me to fully understand it. I love all types of music but some form more than others because of that ability alone. When the inspiration comes, it comes in waves. You get that lump in your throat (the very same kind you get when you get the uncontrollable urge to scream something very important and/or spiteful) and you just start...writing.